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Kenny The Rooster - Contains Adult Humour

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Line from one of the drillers left near the galley:

Ok, lets declare a draw, you can't cook it, I can't eat it . . .

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Where the hell am I?

I took this shot, not quite sure bout the spelling, however when I looked it up on urban dictionary it was there and even worse than I thunk!

When I saw this photo I immediately thought ''I wish Copey would f**k off posting these type of pics cos it reminds me that I'm not getting a holiday until 2013'' :wall: ....then I saw the next photo :wall: :wall: .

My honeymoon was in Sand Key,Clearwater (bit of a 'pensioner-town' compared to the rest of the state) just up from Madiera:WARNING: Don't rent a jet-bike from the Welsh(b45t4rd <_< ) there (remember me telling you about the cyl'head gasket curse I have).Don't get me wrong,the Gulf of Mexico is a beautiful place just..not when your craft has quit,is smoking,is drifting into the shipping lane and it's getting dark :o People took the pee-pee for years after cos an episode of the comedy 'Only Fools and Horses' had a similar plot. ^_^

Edited by HAM2

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When I saw this photo I immediately thought ''I wish Copey would f**k off posting these type of pics cos it reminds me that I'm not getting a holiday until 2013'' :wall: ....then I saw the next photo :wall: :wall: .

My honeymoon was in Sand Key,Clearwater (bit of a 'pensioner-town' compared to the rest of the state) just up from Madiera:WARNING: Don't rent a jet-bike from the Welsh(b45t4rd <_< ) there (remember me telling you about the cyl'head gasket curse I have).Don't get me wrong,the Gulf of Mexico is a beautiful place just..not when your craft has quit,is smoking,is drifting into the shipping lane and it's getting dark :o People took the pee-pee for years after cos an episode of the comedy 'Only Fools and Horses' had a similar plot. ^_^

It is a nice area, though not quite the blue water of some more remote islands and such, but seems everything is within reach. Having done a bit if Scuba in Cozumel, Bahamas, Cayman and Maui, I would not rate it with them, but for a leisure time it is fine, and nice beaches, specially if you get off the beaten path of the tourists!

Found fresh seafood great in John's Pass about three times. The sprig, having been down there for a while, led us to the more secludid beach area dorn souph and away from the tourist beach. Follow the road to here, nice park at the end.

post-36-0-01410300-1337827172.jpg

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light travels faster than sound this is why some people appear intelligent until they start to talk......

credit to carlsberg the farmer for this wisdom

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Tripped over this in the archives. Old 'un but a good 'un :)

post-5107-0-14257900-1339439832_thumb.jpg

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Hell Yea man, I'm in for this job!

Person Specification:

General Manager - SACU

Qualifications:

Preferably a formal qualification in Business Management or equivalent level

of experience.

Skills and Experience:

A minimum of 3 years business experience. Demonstrable record of success

within a general management/supervisory role in a comparable organisation.

Wide commercial experience, such as business management, human

resources or IT.

Strong interpersonal skills, with the ability to manage and develop staff

creating good team work.

Ability to develop, implement, manage and monitor effective business and

financial systems and procedures.

Experience and understanding of human resource practices, policies and

procedures

Previous experience of Health and Safety policies, procedures and practices

would be desirable.

A working knowledge of motorcycle sport or an equivalent sporting

association would be a desirable attribute.

Personal Characteristics:

An enthusiastic leader with a demonstrative personality, conduct and

credibility to set, maintain and exceed consistent high quality standards

commensurate with organisational expectations.

Sound analytical and computer skills.

An ability to communicate at all levels.

Strong work ethic and customer focussed.

Target driven - with the ability to work to, and set timely performance

goals/targets and set clear objectives.

A strategic thinker.

A motivational and supportive management style.

SACU –

All I need is about 75k annually plus moving expenses. Yet I do have one question. This thing about the ability to communicate upon all levels. Does that include the fingers?

Edited by copemech
  • Like 1

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At the National Art Gallery in Dublin, a husband and wife were staring at a

portrait that had them completely confused.

The painting depicted three black men totally naked sitting on a park bench.

Two of the figures had black penises, but the one in the middle had a pink

penis.

The curator of the gallery realized that they were having trouble

interpreting the painting and offered his assessment. He went on for over

half an hour explaining how it depicted the sexual emasculation of black men

in a predominately white, patriarchal society.

'In fact,' he pointed out, 'some serious critics believe that the pink

penis also reflects the cultural and sociological oppression experienced by

gay men in contemporary society.'

After the curator left, an Irishman approached the couple and said, 'Would

you like to know what the painting is really about?'

'Now why would you claim to be more of an expert than the curator of the

gallery?' asked the couple.

'Because I'm the guy who painted it,' he replied.. 'In fact, there are no

black men depicted at all. They're just three Irish coal miners. The guy in

the middle went home for lunch."

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Happy fathers day! :beer:

A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 21 years, the son is old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar and tearfully tells the son he is proud of him.

Dad orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol. Swoooop! A torso pops out!

The bar is dead silent; then bursts into a whoop of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant "Take another drink"! The bartender still shakes his head in dismay.

Swoooop! Two arms pops out. The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, "Take another drink"! The bartender ignores the whole affair. By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Swoooop! Two legs pop out.

The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left.... then to the right.... right through the front door, into the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly.

The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says, "That boy should have quit while he was a head."

Edited by joekarter

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I was at the pool today & decided to have a sneaky p*** in the deep end. The life guard must have noticed, he blew his whistle so bloody loud, I nearly fell in.

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