October 10, 200718 yr Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, But never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card- Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship. 1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the swine who made you sad. 2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you. 3. When you smile -- I will know you got laid. 4. When you are scared -- I will take the p**s out of you about it, every chance I get. 5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whinging. 6. When you are confused -- I will use little words. 7. When you are sick -- Stay away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever you have. 8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass. Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.
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