b40rt

If your in the UK your GP will probably tell you to stop doing whatever is causing the pain, and / or pain killers, not very helpful. See a sports injury specialist. Buy some plastic knee protectors, may take a little getting used to but preferable to the alternative.

and finally :- Three women die together in an accident and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule here in heaven: don't step on the ducks!" So they enter heaven, and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly man!" The next day, the second woman steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing. With him is another extremely ugly man. He chains them together with the same admonishment as for the first woman. The third woman has observed all this and, not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly man, is very, VERY careful where she steps. She manages to go months without stepping on any ducks, but one day St Peter comes up to her with the most handsome man she has ever laid eyes on St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. The happy woman says, "I wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all of eternity?" The guy says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck!"

SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2007 A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart. One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. milling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier." I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?" I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?" Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.... but at least that bi*ch knows I'm smarter than her.

Your probably going to practice wheelies, try slow speed ones, they are much harder and will improve your throttle control.

Thanks PeterB Will give that a try, last time I was in there I found bits of red hermatite and a small piece of piston ring ! mind you it was years ago, so I'me not to worried. Regards Ross

Hi PeterB Yes, the engine fills with oil, but will fill over a few days if left at anything other TDC, if left at TDC will take 2/3 weeks. There is a ball valve as you say just in font of the timing cover, which is not really accessable with the engine in the frame, so as yet I,ve not touched it. I will give a tap, I,me all for percussive maintenance! Thanks Ross

Hi John I thought he was in Cupar, but could'nt think how to spell it ! Thanks for the number. Like you're self, I've never had to touch a spoke in the twenty years I've had it. Regards Ross

Hi John Is George Spence in Fife ? Have you a tele' no. Will contact him and see what he says, I think he built the wheels originally. I'me using 20/50 and changing it every 2 - 3 trials. Ross

Chain / tyre clearance on my B40 is minimal, I dont think the rear whel can be dished enought to give adequate clearance. Has anybody put a spacer between the sprocket and hub, then made new axel spacers to effectivly move the wheel away from the chain by a corresponding amount ? There is plenty of clearance to the right of he tyre. While I'me picking your brains, I've noticed that if I leave the bike with piston at TDC that it doesn't wet sump as quickly, is this something to do with where the oil pump positon in its stroke ?Thanks in advance for any thoughs / observations. Ross

Yes, got one to.

I think everybody does this once !

Cotter pins are fine once you get used to them. I use a tube with a hole large enough for the pin to pass through. This tube has to be the length / distance from your kick start to the ground (with the bike standing vertically. The idea is that as you hit the threaded end of the cotter pin, the forces are transfered to the ground rather than trying to bend the kickstart shaft. Use a bras drift or similar , and something like a Thore hammer, which gives a good solid thump. Replacement cotter pins can be bought from a pedal cycle shop. Normally I start the pin moving with the nut still attached, but undone till it is flush with the top of the pin, this stops you damaging the threads. Hope this helps. Ross

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? A: Bigfoot has been sighted. Q: Why did the blonde die in a helicopter crash? A: She got cold and turned off the fan. Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A: Gifted! Q: How do blonde brain cells die? A: Alone. Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? A: Pregnant. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a supermarket trolley? A: The supermarket trolley has a mind of its own. Q: Why do blondes take the pill? A: So they know what day of the week it is. Q: If a blonde and a brunette are tossed off a building, who hits the ground first? A: The brunette. The blonde has to stop to ask for directions. Q: What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts? A: Change. Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday mornings? A: Tell them a joke on Friday night! Q: Why did God create blondes? A: Because sheep can't bring beer from the fridge. Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short? A: So brunettes can remember them.

You could buy a kit to make up a longer cable. (www.trialsbits.co.uk amiungst others.)

Jack Aebi, he rode in the SSDT didnt he ?

I always felt it was the forks on the KT that let it down, not the geometry !

Whats the bet this e-mail originates in Nigeria !

I have to agree with copemech, based on experience riding other peoples bikes which always feel like the bars are twisted etc when you get on, and yet within a few seconds you really dont notice. Just my opinion.

My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She was not happy with what she sees and says to me, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.' I replied, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.' And then the fight starts .....

See trialsbits.co.uk for info.

Differences between men and women. NICKNAMES If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes. EATING OUT When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in

Have a look at www.trialsbits.co.uk dont know if they will post to you but worth checking out as some advice there also.

Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary. He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around and he landed heavily on his rump. A whiskey bottle in each back pocket broke and made the landing especially painful. Managing not to yell, Flynn sprung up, pulled down his pants, and looked in the hall mirror to see that his butt cheeks were cut and bleeding. He managed to quietly find a full box of Band-Aids and began putting a Band-Aid as best he could on each place he saw blood. He then hid the now almost empty Band-Aid box and shuffled and stumbled his way to bed. In the morning, Flynn woke up with searing pain in both his head and butt and Mary staring at him from across the room. She said, "You were drunk again last night weren't you?" Flynn said, "Why you say such a mean thing?" "Well," Mary said, "it could be the open front door, it could be the broken glass at the bottom of the stairs, it could be the drops of blood trailing through the house, it could be your bloodshot eyes, but mostly.....it's all those Band-Aids stuck on the hall mirror.