steveo

If this is accurate surely he will have to stripped of his title and only allowed in twin shock / classic events...

One for Copey

Is she the chick off American Pickers ?

Interesting to see some of the comments, just wait a while till more countries have the courage to have their own Brexit and shake this milestone from there necks and get their respective countries back in order doing what is best for them.

Dear Sir, Can you answer this benefits question please? Many years ago, I married a widow out of love who had an 18-year-old daughter. After the wedding, my father, a widower, came to visit a number of times, and he fell in love with my step-daughter. My father eventually married her without my authorization. As a result, my step-daughter legally became my step-mother and my father my son-in-law. My father's wife (also my step-daughter) and my step-mother, gave birth to a son who is my grandchild because I am the husband of my step-daughter's mother. This boy is also my brother, as the son of my father. As you can see, my wife became a grandmother, because she is the mother of my father's wife. Therefore, it appears that I am also my wife's grandchild. A short time after these events, my wife gave birth to a son, who became my father's brother-in-law, the step-son of my father's wife, and my uncle. My son is also my step-mother's brother, and through my step-mother, my wife has become a grandmother and I have become my own grandfather. In light of the above mentioned, I would like to know the following: Does my son, who is also my uncle, my father's son-in-law, and my step-mother's brother fulfill the requirements for receiving childcare benefits? Sincerely yours, Mohammed *Of course you qualify Mo, I have arranged to start mailing checks to all of you, just as soon as you arrive here in Australia. Welcome aboard. Bill Shorten

A Harley bikie is riding by the zoo in Taronga Park, Sydney, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lions' cage Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside, under the eyes of her screaming parents. The bikie jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and belts the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch. Whimpering from pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the little girl, and the bikie grabs her and returns her to her terrified parents who thank him endlessly. A reporter has watched the whole event. The reporter, addressing the Harley rider says, 'Sir, that was the most gallant and bravest thing I've ever seen a man do in my whole life.' The Harley bikie replies, 'It was nothing, really . . . the lion was behind bars . . . I saw this little kid in danger and did what I thought was right.' The reporter says, 'Well, I'll make sure this won't go unnoticed. I'm a journalist, and tomorrow's paper will have this story on the front page. So, pulling out a pad and a pencil he said, 'What do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?' The bikie replied, 'I'm an SAS soldier just returned from Afghanistan and a Liberal party supporter.' The journalist leaves. The following morning the biker buys the paper to see news of his actions, and reads, on the front page: “SAS SOLDIER ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH” That pretty much sums up the media's approach to the news these days!!!

A little Irishman gets into an elevator, looks up and sees the only occupant, a HUGE black guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little Irishman staring at him. He looks down and says: "7 ft. tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, Turner Brown." The little Irishman faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big guy kneels down and brings him round, shaking him. The big guy says, "What's wrong with you?" In a weak voice, the little guy says, "What EXACTLY did you just say to me?" The big dude says, "Well, I saw your curious look and I figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me............... I 'm 7 ft. tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch penis, ....and my name is Turner Brown." The Irishman says: "Turner Brown?!....Sweet Jesus.........I thought you said, “Turn around!"

A lady walks into a Chemist shop and tells the pharmacist she needs some cyanide. The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady then explained she needed it to poison her husband. The pharmacist's eyes got big and he said, ... "Crikey! -- I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license, they'll throw both of us in jail and all kinds of bad things will happen! Absolutely not, I will not sell you any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well, now. You didn't tell me you had a prescription

See, I was right....

No Stop

This is the first post that has got my interest and you don't finish the story......pity I'm over talkin bikes.

Maybe Dibbs went for safety and took the heavier bike.

Blonde in church An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumour that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family." No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again, all was quiet. Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible mis-understanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets." The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared. Life is short, smile while you still have teeth. Give me an Amen brother!

An Engineer Could Not Find A Job, So He Opens A Clinic, And Puts A Sign Outside That Says Get Treatment For $50, If Not Cured Get Back $100. A Doctor Thinks This Is A Good Opportunity Show Up The Engineer And Earn A Quick $100. And So He Visits The Clinic. Doctor: I Have Lost My Sense Of Taste. Engineer: Nurse , Bring The Medicine From Box No 22 And Place 3 Drops In The Patient's Mouth. Patient (Doctor): Spits Out The Medicine And Says "This Is Not Medicine, It's Gasoline". Engineer: Congrats.. You Have Your Taste Back ..That Will Be $50 Doctor Gets Annoyed, And Returns After Several Days To Recover His Money. Doctor : I Have Lost My Memory And Can't Remember A Thing. Engineer : Nurse , Bring Medicine From Box No 22 And Put 3 Drops In Patient's Mouth. Doctor: "This Medicine Is For The Sense Of Taste" Protests The Doctor. Engineer : Congrats. Your Memory Is Back.. ..That Will Be $50 Doctor Leaves, But After Several Days Angrily Returns For One Last Try. Doctor : My Eyesight Has Become Weak. Engineer : Well I Don't Have Any Medicine For That. Take This $100 Doctor : But This Is $50 Note Engineer : Congratulations, Your Eyesight Has Gotten Better. ..That Will be $50

Man Killed on Golf Course A foursome of guys was waiting at the men's tee while a foursome of women was hitting from the women's tee. The ladies were not rushing and were taking their time. When the final lady was ready to hit her ball, she hacked it ten feet. Then she went over and whiffed it completely. Then she hacked it another ten feet and finally hacked it another five feet. She looked up at the patiently waiting men and said apologetically, "I guess all those f*****g lessons I took over the winter didn't help." One of the men immediately responded, "Well, there you have it. You should have taken golf lessons instead!" He never even had a chance to duck. He was only 63 . . .

Australian Computer Terminology - getting ready for Broadband in the Aussie Bush! · LOGON: Adding wood to make the barbie hotter · LOG OFF: Not adding any more wood to the barbie. · MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie. · DOWNLOAD: Getting the firewood off the ute. · HARD DRIVE: Making the trip back home without any cold tinnies. · KEYBOARD: Where you hang the ute keys. · WINDOWS: What you shut when the weather's cold. · SCREEN: What you shut in the mozzie season.. · BYTE: What mozzies do · MEGABYTE: What Townsville mozzies do. · CHIP: A pub snack. · MICROCHIP: What's left in the bag after you've eaten the chips. · MODEM: What you did to the lawns. · LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps. · SOFTWARE: Plastic knives and forks you get at Red Rooster. · HARDWARE: Stainless steel knives and forks - from K-Mart. · MOUSE: The small rodent that eats the grain in the shed. · MAINFRAME: What holds the shed up. · WEB: What spiders make. · WEBSITE: Usually in the shed or under the veranda. · SEARCH ENGINE: What you do when the ute won't start. · CURSOR: What you say when the ute won't start. · YAHOO: What you say when the ute does start. · UPGRADE: A steep hill. · SERVER: The person at the pub who brings out the counter lunch. · MAIL SERVER: The bloke at the pub who brings out the counter lunch. · USER: The neighbour who keeps borrowing things. · NETWORK: What you do when you need to repair the fishing net. · INTERNET: Where you want the fish to go. · NETSCAPE: What the fish do when they discover a hole in the net. · ONLINE: Where you hang the washing. · OFFLINE: Where the washing ends up when the pegs aren't strong enough.

That's gotta be Tonys mother

A doctor in Dublin wanted to get off work and go fishing, so he approached his assistant. "Murphy, I am going fishing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients". > "Yes, sir!" answers Murphy. > The doctor goes fishing and returns the following day and asks: "So, Murphy, how was your day?" > Murphy told him that he took care of three patients. "The first one had a headache so he did, so I gave him Paracetamol." > "Bravo Murphy lad, and the second one?" asks the doctor. > "The second one had indigestion and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir" says Murphy. > "Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the tird one?" asks the doctor. > "Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman bursts in so she does. Like a bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, taking off everyting including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table, spreading her legs and shouts: > 'HELP ME for the love of St Patrick! For five years I have not seen any man!'" > "Tunderin' lard Jesus, Murphy, what did you do?" asks the doctor. > "I put drops in her eyes."

A Priest came along and asked the little boy what he had. The little boy said, 'This is the most powerful liquid in the world; it's called Turpentine.' The Priest said, 'No, the most powerful liquid in the world is Holy Water. If you rub it on a pregnant woman's belly, she'll pass a healthy baby.' The little boy replied, 'If you rub turpentine on a cat's a$se, he'll pass a Harley Davidson !'

Sam, read carefully PeterB's recommendation as a better replacement for your damaged head.

Use a 20 ml medical syringe. Remove the plunger and discard. Touch the outlet nozzle of the syringe on a hot plate to seal. I mix one litre at a time. I use 8 ml per litre, add the oil to your petrol then flush the syringe with the petrol a couple of times to remove the residue on the syringe walls for accuracy of oil component.

Tony Bou's DNA is wired at a much higher degree of precision than the rest,. His obvious desire to maintain an ever improving riding standard and superior fitness that surpasses all his rivals makes his domination such a complete package.. Add to that the seemingly unlimited backing of Honda Japan, there is no one on the horizon at this stage, that will challenge the most professional and successful partnership ever seen in Trials.

Mark, those guys are just a ploy to p*** off the other riders, after all, he needs all the help he can get.

In regard to the question on FI components. I have had the first 3 280i Ossa's with all of them used exclusively for Trials, no fast trail riding. The first 2 had over 120 hours with no problems at all with the FI and the 2013 has only 100 hours and again not a problem in that department.