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Especially for Copey; a little airway humour: =========================================================================================== Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!" Delta 351: "Give us another hint! We have digital watches!" ________________________________________________________________________ Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees." TWA 2341: "Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?" Tower: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?" __________________________________________________________ From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: "I'm f....ing bored!" Ground Traffic Control: "Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!" Unknown aircraft: "I said I was f...ing bored, not f....ing stupid!" _______________________________________ O'Hare Approach Control to a 747: "United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o'clock, three miles, Eastbound." United 329: "Approach, I've always wanted to say this...I've got the little Fokker in sight." _______________________________________ A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down. San Jose Tower Noted: "American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. If you are not able, take the Guadeloupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport." _________________________________________ A Pan Am 727 flight, waiting for start clearance in Munich, overheard the following: Lufthansa (in German): "Ground, what is our start clearance time?" Ground (in English): "If you want an answer you must speak in English." Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. Why must I speak English?" Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!" ____________________________________________________________________________________ Tower: "Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7" Eastern 702: "Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway." Tower: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?" Continental 635: "Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern... We've already notified our caterers." _________________________________________ One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, "What a cute little plane. Did you make it all by yourself?" The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: "I made it out of DC-8 parts. Another landing like yours and I'll have enough parts for another one." ________________________________________ The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206. Speedbird 206: "Frankfurt, Speedbird 206! Clear of active runway." Ground: "Speedbird 206. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven." The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop. Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?" Speedbird 206: "Stand by, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now." Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?" Speedbird 206 (coolly): "Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, -- And I didn't land." ________________________________________ While taxiing at London's Airport, the crew of a US Air flight departing for Ft. Lauderdale made a wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. An irate female ground controller lashed out at the US Air crew, screaming: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you going? I told you to turn right onto Charlie taxiway! You turned right on Delta! Stop right there. I know it's difficult for you to tell the difference between C and D, but get it right!" Continuing her rage to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting hysterically: "God! Now you've screwed everything up! It'll take forever to sort this out! You stay right there and don't move till I tell you to! You can expect progressive taxi instructions in about half an hour, and I want you to go exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you! You got that, US Air 2771?" "Yes, ma'am," the humbled crew responded. Naturally, the ground control communications frequency fell terribly silent after the verbal bashing of US Air 2771. Nobody wanted to chance engaging the irate ground controller in her current state of mind.. Tension in every cockpit out around Gatwick was definitely running high. Just then an unknown pilot broke the silence and keyed his microphone, asking: "Wasn't I married to you once?"

My Chinese friend told me that he had just opened a 'crows shop', I laughed and told him that he must mean a 'clothes shop'. He said 'no, come and take a rook'.

Her Majesty's Pleasure? Only kidding, sounds like you're gonna enjoy that bike.

Run 2 different models alongside each other? No company could pull that off in the current economic climate unless it's an overlap of an outgoing model.

I'm keen to move away from the ad hominem attacks and concentrate on the technical attributes of a new bike. I'm not convinced that the Sherco/Scorpa co-operative have considered that they may be targeting the same customer? The Sherco with its added fuel pump and metal petrol tank claims to be lighter than the Scorpa, utilizing a plastic tank 'sans' pump...hmm? Dangerous days?

Yes? Broadcasters who don't read through first..... Anyway, on the subject of bad taste jokes: Do you name your todger? My ex-girlfriend called mine the 'Impaler' when she was kneeling down there, at least that's what I thought she said just before her last ever asthma attack.

On a bitterly cold winter morning a husband and wife in Dublin were Listening to the radio during breakfast. They heard the announcer say, "We Are going to have 8 to 10 inches of snow today. You must park your car on The even-numbered side of the street, so the Snow ploughs can get through. "So the good wife went out and moved her car. A week later while they were eating breakfast again, when the radio announcer Said, "We are expecting 10 to 12 inches of snow today. You must park your Car on the odd-numbered side of the street, so the snow ploughs can get through. "The good wife went out and moved her car again. The next week they were again having breakfast, when the radio announcer Said, "We are expecting 12 to 14 inches of snow today. You must park...." Then the electric power went out. The good wife was very upset, and with a Worried look on her face she said, "I don't know what to do. Which side of the street do I need to park on so the snow ploughs can get Through?" Then with the love and understanding in his voice that all men who are Married to blondes exhibit, the husband replied, "Why don't you just leave The bloody car in the garage this time."

The big game hunter walked in the bar and bragged to everyone about his hunting skills. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute that. But then he said that they could blindfold him and he would recognize any animal's skin from its feel, and if he could locate the bullet hole he would even tell them what calibre the bullet was that killed the animal. The hunter said that he was willing to prove it if they would put up the drinks, and so the bet was on. They blindfolded him carefully and took him to his first animal skin. After feeling it for a few moments, he announced "Bear." Then he felt the bullet hole and declared, "Shot with a .308 rifle." He was right. They brought him another skin, one that someone had in their car trunk. He took a bit longer this time and then said, "Elk, Shot with a 7mm Mag rifle. He was right again. Through the night, he proved his skills again and again, every time against a round of drinks. Finally he staggered home, drunk out of his mind,and went to sleep. The next morning he got up and saw in the mirror that he had one hell of a shiner. He said to his wife, "I know I was drunk last night, but not drunk enough to get in a fight and not remember it. Where did I get this blackeye?" His wife angrily replied, "I gave it to you. You got into bed and put your hand down my panties. Then you fiddled around a bit and loudly announced, "Skunk, killed with an axe."

A Jewish grandmother is giving directions to her grown grandson who is coming to visit with his wife. "You come to the front door of the apartments. I am in apartment 301. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow, push button 301. I will buzz you in. Come inside and the elevator is on the right. Get in, and with your elbow, push 3rd Floor. When you get out, I'm on the left. With your elbow, hit my doorbell. OK?" "Grandma, that sounds easy, but, why am I hitting all these buttons with my elbow? ......... "Whaaat . .. . .. .. You're coming empty handed?"

Great subject matter, technique, style, control, production values, soundtrack...it's all in there...pure Class with a capital C Should be labelled N.S.F.W as I could lose my job watching that again and again. Thanks for sharing, Wayne

We didn't call a 'Stang a Stang until it had a Merlin fitted, I think we called the Allison P-51 an Apache?

Swap a stator to be sure, they're intermittent ,temperamental buggers at times . You may be looking at a heat induced insulation problem; very hard to define with a meter so see if you can find a short term donor stator to test.

The Dodge Ram? What an angry little b45t4rd !!!

Never run the engine straight after you've washed the bike, dry the airbox and change the filter first...and times two for the pressure washer . Wayne

The same as Bockscar and Enola Gay I suppose...four..pratt and witneys or wright cyclone, I get them mixed up. The Merlin question was a doozy, the Me109 Buchon is fitted with one, how ironic, I hope Goerring is spinning in his grave

...more merlins, around me all day, I'm beginning to like this gardening malarky. Quiz time, just for fun; Today, these birds flew around my garden: Hurricane Mk2 Lancaster Catalina Spitfire Buchon ( Spanish Me109) P51 Mustang. How many Merlins were there?

I don't like gardening and I'm not rich enough to pay someone to do it for me...but today was an excellent day for me to do the garden; apart from the other stars of the Sunderland air show which overfly my house this beauty did two circuits around my strimmer...just for me http://www.ferociousfrankie.com/

F###ing Ay, as the US Marines would say. ..Arrogance? And as the t-shirt says; It's not bragging when you can back it up. Julien is bad for the image of our sport, he's a yob. To compare the two is an insult to Jason.

Does he dance around a brass pole ?Funny you should mention Hank, my wife does accuse me of generating my own propane!

I was passing through DFW last week doing the Geordie abroad thing, asking complete strangers if they knew Mark Cope but none of them had heard of you! Texas must be bigger than I thought or you're just not very popular? Wayne

Agreed, but as I get older I read more about them and consequently they are on my mind much more often than every June 6th. They walk amongst us, they won't last forever, I choose to gain a bit of knowledge of their experiences to make them immortal. Not long ago we buried my wife's Great Uncle, he commanded a machine gun squad on D-day, he was 19!! He revealed the unwritten rule on capturing an enemy sniper. Rough stuff. (Excuse the delivery not the sentiment.) Wayne

I typed this into google translate for a giggle and it blew up For a modern bike (1990's onward) I can't see the oil choice being that critical, yet if I had a GasGas Pro I would choose very carefully 'cos an added consideration must take into account that the mains sit in gearbox oil...would ATF suffice? From what I remember ATF is just a low viscosity/high shear hydraulic oil with minimal lubricating properties? I am willing to be corrected if someone wishes to take this up in detail. Wayne

..and a dog, train him/her to sleep behind an external door (seriously). It doesn't have to be a gnarly beast, just an alert one, it will tip you off before your alarm does. Even if it's a softy put up a 'beware of the dog' sign.

Atom, it's very difficult to ride through the end cards of a section and get your results if your gearbox is kaput I think this track is in keeping with my post, I'll get me coat.....

Go on there Glen, keep it going, may the force be with you.